Thursday, July 9

CONDOLENCES

I keep dead flowers for my cruelty.

Inconsiderate me, and thousand dead flowers.


Consider this:

Dancing on a dying man’s heart and sleeping

That joyful slumber of the cats while you watch them.


God, if thy claims are true,

Thou must be angry with this unruly child

For I am not thy sheep. Silly sheep.

I am an unfeeling lady with interests.

Passions, preferably.


It is not a habit.

It is my eyes which stare,

Eyes carved unskillfully on objects which see me.


You won’t call me cruel

Because you love me, and I know it

Even while I watch you

I know it

Even while I kill you, die

My widow dance would be an event

Of the highest scale


So I will walk free,

Sly criminal, covered in flowers,

Walking free.


Yes, the price one pays for freedom.

9 comments:

  1. "Consider this:" is rather unsightly it may be appropriate in the sense that it would be in character for the poem but still, it just breaks the flow of the poem in a bad way.
    The line just after that seems so familiar, hence lacking in originality.
    From there on it gets considerably better with amusing allegories and sharp departures from the expected. Quite nice.
    Next stanza alludes to understanding of the effect but not the cause, further introspection here could lead to some more nice poetry.
    Haha, this one is classic Susan and it's so awesome it may as well be a hallmark. It may only be described as the emotion you feel when you read it.
    Brilliance continues in a cute predator style.
    Very classy, rest of the poem makes up for the initial discomfort, that however intentional, cannot be excused. Still very awesome overall.

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  2. its soo cuute! :D

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  3. Lemme tell you a little more about the above anonymous cute person. His name is Sarath, and a wondeful person. And this dear people is his profile link: http://www.blogger.com/profile/14354771322547023012

    He loves his profile :|

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  4. the first line has touched me .... "i keep dead flowers for my cruelty". could remend the reader of all the dead flower he/she keeps deep in the mind

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  5. the lines r so touchy n emotional dat it has etched in my heart n makes me realize dat even a rational person lyk mee has a benevolence hidden somewhere in it......

    keep up the good work.... anticipating more gud works 2 come!!!

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  6. the first thing that catches my attention here , is that the poem's discontinuous. it breaks off at every stanza and it's quite hard to pin it down to one topic. which is also quite disconcerting , since it justs looks like a collection of random thoughts.
    at other times , each stanza reads like a haiku. which is very very pretty. and the first two lines are very interesting too. :)
    apart from that , the poem's real abstract...

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  7. :) Its good. For one it definitely doesn't feel like you write for the sake of writing. And hence the feeling shows.

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  8. Was that for MJ? :)

    Nice lines. :D

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  9. hey susan! ssup yaar? no news abt u for a long tym... u had promised mee u wud gimme ur new contact number..bt didn't get it yet! so plzz give it soon via mail or text mee tc...

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tell me, now.